Miscommunication or I’m Obtuse

I know I’ve really agitated at least 2 other swappers on here in the past, but this interaction I can’t figure out.

After 2 successful and happy swaps, they initiated a 3rd swap. But then they canceled and blocked me. I don’t know what I said. We are both English speakers.

For context, it was a 55-banknote request from my list. I asked why they wanted as many as 5 of the same (relatively rare) banknotes. I did not want to give away all copies of these notes to one person, because those nations generate new member swap interest for me when people are looking for new issuers, and I would like to share them with more than one Numista member. I’m fine with giving them one copy, but not all copies of a ‘rare nation’. Outside of cataloguing my collection, the main reason I’m on Numista is to swap. 

If I had the chance to mark the notes for them, this would have reduced the swap from 55 to approximately 45 notes. Maybe they thought I only wanted to swap modern China, Hong Kong, and Costa Rica? That would have been only about 22 notes. But maybe it’s something entirely different that I don’t see, like I’m greedy for not wanting to give everything to one person.

Entire conversation:

(THEM), March 28, 2026, 4:06 pm

Would you like to do another swap?

gyoschak, March 29, 2026, 6:03 am

I have to ask: Are you trying to build your swap list using my swap list?

(THEM), March 29, 2026, 8:58 am

No, I just figured out that I can look at coins and bank notes at the same time. What I am gets is going into my collection. I have a collection of roughly 5,000 notes right now. With a lot more that I need to add to the inventory of my collection. It has been a lot of fun getting on here and doing swaps because I am finding so much more then I ever found on eBay.

(THEM), March 29, 2026, 9:05 am

Also with the ones I requested multiple of (except for the military ones) I give to younger collecteRS to help the build there collections. If you are not comfortable with me requesting multiple notes I can take them off.

gyoschak, March 29, 2026, 8:56 pm

Modern China, Hong Kong, Costa Rica is fine for multiples. The others I would like to keep because they generate interest for my own swaps.

[10:43pm Swap canceled/blocked]

I wouldn’t worry about it, one thing I know for sure is; if you call people out (who have less than honest intentions), in this case someone who is actively trying to get as much as possible out of you, whilst not giving a fair swap, either intentionally or unintentionally, they will try to use emotional manipulation to put you down. In this case, blocking you and playing on your honest and integrity, making you question if you did something wrong. Either that or they hit block by mistake 🫤, but in the end it is what it is, and should be water off a ducks back.

Honesty and fairness did not appear to be a factor. No negotiation had occurred yet.

It's very strange to me. I suspect he has me confused with another swap, because he has more than 10 swaps in transit. So in addition to those, he's probably negotiating 10 more right now. 

In the past, I've sent messages to the wrong swapper. And I have received messages intended for another swap. 

This is the first time I've noticed I've been blocked. But I guess there's no way to know you're blocked unless you attempt to send a message.

gyoschak

 I did not want to give away all copies of these notes to one person, because those nations generate new member swap interest for me when people are looking for new issuers, and I would like to share them with more than one Numista member.

 

 

You are right, so do not indicate that you have quantities of the same object, 2 at most is enough.
By mentioning that a copy is reserved for so-and-so, other members may be interested for their collection
 

gyoschak

 

This is the first time I've noticed I've been blocked. But I guess there's no way to know you're blocked unless you attempt to send a message.

True, you can't tell if you've been blocked unless you write to the other member. I'm sure several members have blocked me by now, just as I have blocked others…

For reference, I tried to block you a few years ago for reasons we need not discuss here, but I had already deleted your messages to me.

I later learned that I can only block a member  if I have messages from them in my inbox. Strange but true.

TCon

 

 

I later learned that I can only block a member  if I have messages from them in my inbox. Strange but true.

Or in your own sentbox.  Just send them a message then block them from answering.  😋

I don’t think I have ever blocked anyone, why would anyone need to block other members? Do other members get abusive messages in their inboxes, or are they so scared that they might get a PM from another member they preemptively try and block that member? Or block out of spite?

I welcome the day I get a PM from a fellow member who wishes to say something privately, although in my opinion if it isn’t worth saying in the open it isn‘t worth saying at all, obviously with some exceptions (which are always welcome in my inbox), but I would never then block someone afterwards for sending me a message.

If someone is determined to send you a message, but is unable to do so, they could easily open another account on Numista, or if they had been banned from the website, just come back again and again under different user names. g